Finances Can Make Or Contribute In Marriage Break Ups

Most first marriages start with high hopes and dreams that the uninitiated lovers share in boundless enthusiasm. Such optimism often includes an assumed trust and faith in one another. At the beginning of a new life together it can be easier to share assets and debts equally. As the marriage progresses and years are added to the relationship there are many factors that contribute to a decline in enthusiasm for sharing the money equally such as egos, selfishness, varied ideas about necessities versus wants, etc. Adversity sets in, as it does for all of us. Perhaps there are problems holding a job, or health issues arise, or maybe accidents occur or maybe it is as simple as mistakes which are made while balancing the checkbook. As troubles tax a couple's finances resentment might build as one or both partners look back and wonder if they could have been more prosperous by staying single. If finances are kept separate the chances of working through such adversity together are lessened. Isolated into whats yours is yours and whats mine is mine people feel alone and disheartened even though they share life with another person through marriage. On the other hand, if finances are shared both partners are equally responsible for the successful financial outcome of the union. By jointly holding the money each spouse seeks the inputs and wisdom of the other to manage the accounts for maximum profit. What challenges one faces both face together. What success one achieves both enjoy together.
"When you get married you become one." "Money is a key area that helps bring unity." David Ramsey, Financial Expert. "... spouses should combine all finances and work together towards common agreed upon goals... Separate money equals greed. The bottom line is this: couples that plan their lives and finances together are much more successful financially and with their relationships." --Marriage and Money - Dave Ramsey vs. Suze Orman, March 20, 2012
The old saying goes 'There is no I in team'. Is marriage a contract between me and me, I and I, or is marriage about we, our, us? Going into life together can be tremendously beneficial to both partners. When two become one in all things each becomes more than they are by themselves. Math changes from 1+1=2 to 2 together = anything is possible. Many families have a tradition of saving their nickles and dimes to use to go on vacation. It strikes one as ridiculous to consider each family member saving to go on vacation separately. Mom saves to go see Grandma and Dad saves to go camping and Marsha saves for Disneyland while little Johnny saves to go to the ice cream parlor down the street. Agreeing upon a mutual activity takes negotiation and more effort than going on separate vacations, but it also builds shared memories that are held precious later.
This is not to say that one partner should demure in passiveness and yield to their spouse all financial opinions and decisions. Often there are stark differences in the perspective each companion uses to view resource usage and risk management with. One spouse may be analytical in nature and the other might make their decisions from more of an emotional base. Such dissimilar viewpoints can make it challenging to reach an equilibrium both are comfortable with. It may seem easier just to separate finances. However such a decision can result in grave consequences. "Divorce attorneys have told me that when money is the issue that brings a couple in to see them, as it often is, the specific issue is usually that the husband and wife were living separate financial lives. Want to mess up your marriage? Live separate financial lives." How to Mess Up Your Marriage, Monday, December 12th, 2011, Matt Bell, author of Money and Marriage.
Is there more to a union of two souls than that of corporate mergers? Ironically, finances are often merged in shared business arrangements yet there are some who recommend the opposite approach for couples as if married companions are "... Independent Operators, my term for pairs who keep their accounts entirely separate." Jessica Crouse.
Healthy marriages are built upon compromise, respect for each other, and the willingness to entertain the thought that together you are smarter than you are separately. Nature witnesses to the efficacy of sharing the resources- even birds and animals bring home the bacon to be shared with the whole pride. Think about the survival rate of any animal species that behaved as if each was responsible separately for their maintenance and subsistence. "Life is not 50:50, nor should it be... when did this degrade from a marriage to a micromanaged contractual partnership?... I see a continuum from the first bit of separate money in a marriage to basically living as roommates." Evolving Personal Finance: The Slippery Slope of Separate Money.
Sometimes we might find ourselves wondering why some people make the financial decisions they do. During the recent housing crisis many opinions were expressed via twitter, internet forums, and even talk shows about where the responsibility rested for so many foreclosures. Terms like 'predatory lenders' and 'irresponsible borrowers' were bandied about. It is natural to become couch quarterbacks and passenger seat drivers when viewing problems others encounter, especially when we had no contribution to such problems. How easy it becomes to do the same with a spouse when married partners hold the finances separately. Harboring criticism instead of openly communicating about financial troubles does little to foster unity in marriage.
"For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24). "So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate" (Matthew 19:6). Today it seems as if half of society would amend these Biblical verses to 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife, except financially; and they shall become one flesh' and 'So they are no longer two, except the bank accounts, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate, except the money'.
In this world of hyper competition stress rules. If children are part of a marriage the love and joy that come to parents can also be accompanied by even more stress as the demands on available resources grow. If outside influences threaten the financial stability of the family stress levels rise even higher. Money is one of the major contributors to divorce, and it's easy to see why. Many people are constantly worried about taking care of their families, and as they grow older taking care of themselves through retirement. Such worry can breed fear. Fear can eat at the faith and trust in one another that was assumed at the start of life together. As faith and trust erodes the bonds of matrimony can begin to resemble chains tied to a sinking vessel where it becomes 'every man for himself'. However, if couples are committed to each other 'for richer, for poorer' they can lean on each other for the strength necessary to endure and overcome the challenges of life in these modern times. Years of struggle and effort together can help forge a tie that can defy financial obstacles in favor of the security such strong bonds ensure. Such security might not be financially based, but instead it might find a strong foundation in emotion. This means that sometimes spouses have to choose what is most important to them- money or love.
While comparing the pros and cons of united versus separate finances in marriage a clear conclusion emerges that supports the unified approach. Consider the following from Engaged Marriage: "Reasons Why a Joint Bank Account is Best: Encourages regular communication about finances. Built-in accountability partner on spending matters. Fosters unity in money matters. Strong sense of working together to meet financial goals. Clear that all household income is treated as "our" money. No conflict or administrative work in 'splitting up the bills'... The use of a single joint account also encourages (requires, really) open communication about your finances, which is absolutely critical to a successful marriage." --Should Married Couples Have Joint or Separate Bank Accounts? By Dustin of Engaged Marriage.
A proponent of separate marital finances might argue that many of the benefits outlined herein can still be enjoyed even if spouses are not one with money. Without performing the work necessary for financial harmony it is like trying to describe the taste of salt to someone who has never experienced it before. There is just no substitute for experiencing the rewards other than doing the work it takes for two people to harmoniously live together financially. Communication can become improved as each works to understand the others' point of view. Sacrifice can enhance mutual appreciation as companions work to compromise with each other. Trust grows as each spouse strives to achieve mutual goals set together. Sharing money in marriage is an opportunity, not a burden.
In summation, money can make or break a marriage. Just like most issues in life we can use it to achieve positive results or let it use us in which case negative results often occur. The easy road might seem to be separation of the marriage finances. However, putting aside the possible negative consequences a couple thus engaged will miss out on the opportunities to build an even stronger relationship with their spouse through working together in good faith and trust in one another. It does require work and sometimes it is hard. A couple will not realize the rewards from such hard work by avoiding the same through keeping their finances separate. That trust and faith in each other that was assumed at the start of their life together can, through such hard work, grow into absolute confidence as the years accumulate. I like the following quotation about shared marital finances and conclude with it as follows: "Call me weird, but I just don't understand the logic of this. Call me old-fashioned, but I think marriage should be a partnership. Call me crazy, but I think separating your finances is a bad idea... (what) you are saying to each other is "I mostly trust you, but not with my money." With this sort of attitude, how could you possibly fail??? 'sarcasm drip, drip'" --Separate Finances: A Recipe for Marital Disaster, By Greg | August 28, 2012 | Debt, Income, Saving Money on Club Thrifty.

8 Signs That Suggest You Take Water

It is common knowledge that water is an essential element in our diets. It is the key to the survival of all living organisms on earth. In fact, our bodies are comprised of 70% water, and every organ is affected by the amount of water we consume. But how much water should we be drinking, exactly? We've all heard the age-old dietician reference of '8 full glasses of water each day', but for some people, this is not enough.
The amount of water our bodies need to grow, thrive, and live long healthy lives differs from person to person. It depends on several individual factors, including body weight, diet, exercise, activity level, age, medical conditions, local climate, and more. So the best way to tell if you are drinking enough water is to look for the tell-tale signs that indicate your body needs more. Continue reading to learn the top 8 signs that suggest you need to drink more water, starting today!
The General Rule of Thumb
Although 8 full glasses of water a day is a great recommendation and a good place to start, a more accurate rule of thumb is to drink at least 1 ounce of water per pound of body weight. For those who are moderately active, bump it up to 1.2 ounces, and for those who are extremely active, you need to strive toward at least 1.5 ounces of water. For those who are sedentary, a half an ounce of water per body pound is plenty in terms of health, but is the bare minimum for ideal daily water consumption.

Example:Body Weight = 130 lbs
130 x 1 = 130
Suggested Daily Water In-Take = 130 oz.

*That is about 8 standard-sized bottles of water each day.

As mentioned, the best way to determine whether or not you are drinking enough water is to listen to your own body. There are 8 tell-tale signs that you need to drink more water. If one or more of these signs are happening on a frequent basis, you may not be drinking the amount of water your body needs to be comfortable and healthy. Read through each and then talk to your primary doctor about improving your overall health.
Do You Drink Enough Water?
Here are the signs that indicate your body is in need of some fresh, clean drinking water!

1. Thirst
2. Hunger
3. Headache
4. Constipation
5. Exhaustion
6. Decreased Urination
7. Bad Breath
8. Brain Fog

Ways To Save Marriage And Relationships

Human beings are social animals and crave companionship. After a person meets the basic necessities like food, clothing and shelter, he seeks a a significant other to share his life's journey. It is important that we save relationships that foster goodwill, not only within the family but also in the community. High on the list is saving marriage from divorce.
• Marriage is an institution that sanctifies and legalizes a woman and man living together. This has been a socially acceptable form of cohabitation for centuries in most parts of the world. In today's hi-tech world with new morals being accepted having an accent on personal freedom and privacy, traditional marriage is facing a challenge.
• Marriage offers emotional security and physical intimacy to both husband and wife. It is very natural for couples to have differences of opinion, but they should learn to agreeably disagree rather than break up. More often than not it is a clash of egos that ends a relationship. It is, therefore, essential that steps are taken at once to save marriage from divorce.
• Marriages change over time. It is pertinent to remember that what drew two people together will not help in keeping them together. As a relationship changes over time, partners' priorities shift. At first the man and woman spend time trying to impress one another other. Once they marry, the vagaries of home life dominate and romance takes a back seat. Women often being more emotional tend to feel a bit neglected by their partner who spends more time working to be a better provider. After the family includes children, much of a woman's time is spent taking care of them and she struggles to divide her time between being a wife and mother and work outside the home. The man probably feels neglected at this point. It is, therefore, important for both man and woman regularly to communicate frankly and work out a plan that will enable them to save marriage from divorce.
• Marriages require certain elements. Mutual trust, faith, love, respect and understanding are essential for marriage or any other relationship to survive and thrive. People make mistakes. Sometimes some unintentional remarks uttered on the spur of the moment can cause anger and resentment. If a spouse is cheating, if he/she is being indifferent or if the spouse feels he/she is not paying as much attention it is necessary for them to discuss the issues. This will help save relationships
• Marriages can weather storms. Matters can be sorted through dialogue and discussion. When two people have decided to live together for the rest of their lives, there is common ground. Couples should spend quality time alone at least once a week. Spending time together will encourage them to have an overall perspective and help them rekindle the romance in their lives. One of the partners should take the initiative and break the ice or they should take the help of a counselor like the pastor of the local church or a marriage counselor to sort out the contentious issues.
If even one of the partners is willing, there are a lot of resources available like self-help books, DIY videos and marital therapists who can help save marriage from divorce.

It is essential for teens to have confidence in order to become effective leaders.

It is essential for teens to have confidence in order to become effective leaders. Building confidence is not just about hard work, however. It is important to have fun to boost your confidence and it also boosts your energy. Read this article to find out the different ways you can do this.
Having Fun By Yourself
Having fun for yourself is one good way to build confidence. This can include hobbies, activities, or just being creative. Spending time with yourself is a good way to learn more about your traits and skills, as well as getting to know what you like to do. It also helps you to feel more comfortable with just being with yourself, instead of counting on others to give you confidence.
Having Fun at School
Another positive way to have confidence is by having fun at school. If you have a good time at school it creates a lot of energy that you can share with others. This is helpful in building friendships. Joining clubs, playing sports and doing projects can also help in this way.
Having Fun with Family
Spending time with the family is good as well. You can grow in confidence by helping plan fun activities with your family. This is also a great way to practice leadership skills. You can get together with your family and discuss how you would like to have fun together and then take responsibility for doing the planning.
Having Fun with Friends
Being with friends is also an effective way to build confidence. Just by hanging out with them, playing games, or playing sports, you gain and share a lot of energy. This builds, and it also helps from a social standpoint as well.
Having Fun with Vacations
Vacations can also be used to feel good and build your energy levels. Whether it is by yourself or with others, they are a great way to have fun and boost your confidence. Vacations can be simple, too, so you can take them more often to gain the energy you need.
So teens can gain confidence not just through hard work, but by creating energy through fun activities. This can be done by themselves or with others, and can lead to becoming more effective leaders.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/4800097

We must be extra careful not to give away our powers, especially to undeserving people!

We must be extra careful not to give away our powers, especially to undeserving people! Yes. We have powers; very special powers, and lots of them too. And yes we can still hold on to these powers even when dealing with people who make us feel small.
Some people have a way of making us feel angry and even insecure. Sometimes we feel like we can't take another minute of that person. Regardless of how we initially feel about this person, we must never allow this person to belittle our souls by making us hate him or her.
We live in an imperfect world where sometimes people are going to do things we don't like. Some people will accidentally hurt us, while others will intentionally hurt us. Yes... Some people will try to hurt us on purpose. It's sad, but let's not get too mad about the injustice of an imperfect world. Let's not hate the hurter. They are just making some erroneous attempt to regain some of their own powers by trying to ruffle our feathers.
What the big meanies don't understand is that personal power can be elusive and trying to steal others' powers is always an inferior method to just creating one's own. Sadly, some people just don't know how to create their own feelings of power and control. They mistakenly believe that making us mad gives them back a sense of control and power, however false it may be. It's sad, isn't it? So let's not help them continue down this wrong road of harassing and bullying others. Let's stand on the higher ground of love and help these people who don't know how to help themselves.
Now teens, go learn, lead, and lay the way to a better world for all of us. Remember that we shall allow no man nor any woman to belittle our souls by making us hate them. Nope. It just isn't going to happen! We're too good for that, and we know it! And once again, thanks in advance for all that you do, and all that you will do...

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9509704

Pros and cons of dating And Marriage

Someone likened dating and marriage to a road trip! The reasoning is obvious; planning and execution are needed to make a success of any venture. While dating it is necessary to be cautious and careful giving considerable thought and attention to where it leads, it is the same with marriage, being well-informed, prepared and aware of the pros and cons is absolutely vital.
Most people planning to get married go through the process of questioning themselves and wondering if they are making the right decision. Dating seems to be a fairly easy option with 'no strings attached' and provides the opportunity to cement the relationship between a couple before they plunge into matrimony. However, dating does not always provide stability in a relationship and can very well leave an individual feeling depressed or forlorn.
Pros and cons of dating
Besides giving the opportunity for individuals to build a firm footing in the relationship at hand, it also provides the space to build identities. Dating also provides the time and space for individuals to establish themselves in a career, have economic stability and financial independence and work around family commitments. Being truly ready when saying "I do" is the advice offered by many marriage counselors.
However, on the other hand, in the absence of stability and commitment in the relationship, chances of it ending sooner are possible especially if one partner feels that he or she is not getting much out of it. Although the absence of legal binding gives greater freedom, this can also affect a relationship adversely.
Pros and cons of marriage
Marriage is a huge step in an individual's life and one that brings much happiness. Marriage brings stability, causes less depression and makes people accountable and responsible. It also gives a sense of accomplishment when two people make a commitment to respect and love each other and build a future around it.
On the downside, taking the decision to marry too early or too soon without the period of dating can cause severe financial constraints and limitations. Making decisions about the future which revolve around having children, investments and career could mean compromises for one or both in many crucial areas.
Going into a marriage without clear thinking and planning on vital issues can cause serious rifts between couples, more so if one individual is seen to be making all the adjustments to make the relationship work. The longer a couple stays in a marriage, the more important it is to reinforce communication and commitment.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9508174

Hurting your man and wanting him back can be a confusing thing for him,But if you're bent on getting him back and make him forget about what's been done, then learn to do these 7 advices:

There's no way to fathom the intensity of pain that a man feels because they're built to not show any emotions. Hurting your man and wanting him back can be a confusing thing for him. But if you're bent on getting him back and make him forget about what's been done, then learn to do these 7 advices:
Swallow your pride and apologize.
The very first step to being given a second chance with your man is to swallow any pride that you have left and to be remorseful of your actions. There's no point in justifying your actions now. At least let him see the regret in your eyes and he might be able to forgive you.
This is the right time to be patient.
You have no right - at all - to impose anything on your man at this point. First, you got him hurt. Also, forcing him to warm up to you just isn't right. Just be pacified in the fact that time heals all wounds so the best thing to do now is to wait.
Try wearing his shoes.
Try to look at the situation through his eyes. Would you have liked the pain? Instead of whining that he still can't find it in his heart to forgive you, why don't you tell him instead that you understand what he's going through.
Remind him of the good memories that you've built together.
Reminisce all the wonderful moments that you've spent as a couple. If you could revisit those times just to make him feel that he's still very much loved and wanted, then do so. Share the sweetest moments with him all over again.
It's time to pay back.
You've taken a big chunk out of his heart so it's time to make recompense. Give him all the gifts that he's been dreaming to have, make love to him in all earnestness (if he still wants to go to bed with you), send him thank you and I'm sorry cards. Through these things, you can slowly win him back once more.
Double your effort in making the relationship work.
Your goal is to make him warm up to you once again this is why you should work extra hard this time. Make this guy realize your commitment and he will surely want to go back into your arms once more.
Never return to your old ways.
So what caused the pain? Another man? Then let go of that other guy. You can't have them both. If you've chosen your boyfriend then keep him. Show full fidelity this time so that you could still earn your boyfriend's trust.

Great Tips on Healthcare to Keep You Robust and Well in Shape:

Here you have great tips on healthcare to keep you robust and well in shape:
1. Blood pressure patients should avoid the consumption of cholesterol rich foods like ghee, oil.
2. Sound sleep acts as a boosting agent for your complete health care. It helps to get rid of diabetes, stomach disorders and skin problems.
3. Did you know that a judicious consumption of chocolate benefits your health? It helps to get rid of heart diseases, stay young, protects your skin and uplifts your mood.
4. Another great healthcare tip is drinking adequate amount of water. This removes all the toxic substances from your body thereby increasing the glow on the face and counteracting harmful diseases. Stone problem can also be cured by drinking lots of water.
5. Every good health guide suggests that you should start your day with a king size breakfast. It keeps you active and energetic throughout the day.
Including the intake of calcium is of utmost importance for the body owing to its body strengthening properties.
6. The complete guide on healthcare suggests that women should pay special attention to their diet owing to the hormonal changes they go through. Super foods like lentils, soy, berries, mushrooms, spinach, tomatoes and nuts provide the required nutrients and boost your efforts on healthcare.
7. All the expecting women should take extra care of their body to ensure balanced and appropriate growth of their baby. Fresh and calcium rich diet at regular intervals is very vital for moms to be.
8. Consume whole fruits instead of juices. They increase the fibre intake and help you stay young and active.
9. The most ancient but the important healthcare tip is, "An apple a day, keeps a doctor away". It provides the ample amount of iron, leads to whiter teeth, curbs all sorts of cancer, controls weight and detoxifies your liver.
10. The contemporary life style today causes so much stress. Providing you a complete guide on healthcare, we suggest foods that would help you get rid of stress. Dark chocolate, papaya, green tea and milk are all time stress busters for mind as well as body.
Lastly, the great tips on healthcare remain effective as long as you are happy. Keep yourself calm and at ease with the surroundings to enjoy a happy and healthy life. Stay fit and beautiful today and always!
Your health is an investment that will benefit you in the long run. The human body is like a machine that runs on the fuel of good diet and workout.

How To Trust Again! Because You Still can!

I received the following question about how to trust again:
I have been hurt a lot but tried to end all the relationships in peace so when I met my Fiance I felt alive and saw him as my right great man. And he is actually great in many ways. But when I found some of his communications with his ex-girl friends, I found that he lied to them a lot. And sometimes he lied to me also. I know our relationship is sort of controlling-resistance. I am trying to control and he is trying to resist. And I told him that I do not trust him or respect him any more for all he has done to other women and me. Because he lied, I felt like I have the right to judge him and to make him feel guilty for what he has done to me and other women. Then he told me that he felt so bad about himself and that he is as bad as what I told him. I feel it is his problem and I cannot respect a man who is not responsible for what he is doing. I've gotten very angry many times and scolded him and called him names. I know I should not have done that but I have lost trust in him. Through the Inner Bonding process I am trying to get myself back and get my love and respect and trust back for him. My question is how I can restore all these? And how can I trust that I will not be his victim in the future?"
And another question about how to trust again, from a different woman:
"Being forthright, honest and loyal are important attributes for myself and in others. Once the 'bridge of trust"' has been burned significantly (i.e. infidelity in marriage or an intimate relationship), can trust be truly re-established when it seems to be more important to one partner? How does the one betrayed respond when the other is apologetic but thinks an apology is enough? How do you prevent this feeling of distrust from affecting future relationships?"
Learning to trust again requires work on two levels:
1. The first thing that needs to be done is your own inner work. You need to do enough Inner Bonding to become a trustworthy loving adult for your own inner child. This means:

• Accepting that you have no control over whether or not someone betrays you again, and letting go of trying to control the other person.
• Fully grieving the loss of trust.
• Learning to trust your own inner knowing. As you develop your trust in your feelings and your Guidance, you are more equipped to sense a lack of integrity in others.
• Becoming willing to lose the other person rather than lose yourself.
• Becoming willing to take whatever loving actions you need to take on your own behalf.

2. The second level of work in learning how to trust again is relationship work:

• Both you and your partner need to attend couples counseling to fully understand your relationship system. Lying is often the result of one person trying to control and the other resisting or fearing honesty. Both partners need to do the work of healing old fears and beliefs and developing a trustworthy loving adult inside, who can be honest rather than deceitful. You can never trust that the other person won't lie or be unfaithful if your own inner healing work isn't a priority.
• Apologies are never enough. Apologies don't mean anything without the inner work to heal the underlying fears and false beliefs that led to lying or being unfaithful.

It is unrealistic to trust again without this inner and relationship work. The wounded self in all of us isn't trustworthy and can act out in very hurtful ways when there isn't a strong loving adult in charge of our actions. For trust to flourish in your relationship, both of you need to become trustworthy loving adults with yourselves and with each other.

Good health shouldn't be taken for granted

Good health shouldn't be taken for granted. One will never realize how important it is until it's gone. Hence, it's critical for us to take care of our health. We should make sure that we keep our bodies as healthy as possible for us not to develop any unwanted diseases in the future. Take a look into these good health tips to get you on the road to a healthy lifestyle.
Good health tip #1: Stop complaining and start moving.
Computers, televisions and video games keep us glued to our seats. It often results for us to become less physical than ever before. We tend to forget that we must move most of the time and start exercising regularly. Even ten minutes of walking can help our body get in shape.
Good health tip #2: Water's good for you.
Water is one of the basic things of life. To keep our body well-hydrated, be sure to drink lots of water. If you don't, you'll be dehydrated. It could lead to fatigue and what's worse, you could have malfunction of kidneys. And just one more thing, alcohol isn't water. Just drink it occasionally otherwise you could develop a liver disease.
Good health tip #3: Cessation of smoking is a must.
Smoking has been one of the main factors of lung cancer. I just can't imagine how millions of people are still drawn to smoking. If you care about your health, then you must definitely stop. You may find it hard to quit but you could start gradually. If you're used to smoking 3 packs of cigarettes a day; reduce it to 2 packs and so on.
Good health tip #4: Have a medical check-up yearly.
Some don't like to have their bodies checked because they're afraid of what the doctors will tell them. That's the point. Medical examinations are necessary to help diagnose any potential diseases such as an impending cancer or diabetes. Do what's good for you before it's too late.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/5686160

Psychological Theories Of Dreaming And Sleep: Part 1

For centuries people have pondered the

meaning of dreams. Early civilizations

thought of dreams as a medium

between our earthly world and that of

the gods. In fact, the Greeks and

Romans were convinced that dreams

had certain prophetic powers . Over the

years, numerous theories have been put

forth in an attempt to illuminate the

mystery behind human dreams. It was

only recently that strong, tangible

evidence has become less elusive.

The Long-standing Mystery of Dreams

Since ancient times, humans have been

trying to understand the purpose of dreams.

Psychological Theories of Dreaming

Freudian and Jungian Theories

While there has always been great

interest in the interpretation of human

dreams, it was not until the end of the

nineteenth century that Sigmund Freud

and Carl Jung put forth some of the

most widely-known modern theories of

dreaming. Freud's theory centered

around the notion of repressed longing

— the idea that dreaming allows us to

sort through unresolved, repressed

wishes. Freud's theory described

dreams as having both latent and

manifest content. Latent content

consists of deep unconscious wishes

or fantasies while manifest content is

superficial and meaningless. Manifest

content often masks or obscures latent

content.

Carl Jung (who studied under Freud)

also believed that dreams had

psychological importance, but

proposed different theories about their

meaning. Jung expanded on Freud's

idea that dream content relates to the

dreamer's unconscious desires. He

thought of dreams as messages to the

dreamer, containing revelations that

could uncover and possibly resolve

emotional or religious problems and

fears.

Psychological Theories Of Dreaming and Sleeping: Part 1

For centuries people have pondered the
meaning of dreams. Early civilizations
thought of dreams as a medium
between our earthly world and that of
the gods. In fact, the Greeks and
Romans were convinced that dreams
had certain prophetic powers . Over the
years, numerous theories have been put
forth in an attempt to illuminate the
mystery behind human dreams. It was
only recently that strong, tangible
evidence has become less elusive.
The Long-standing Mystery of Dreams
Since ancient times, humans have been
trying to understand the purpose of dreams.

Psychological Theories of Dreaming
Freudian and Jungian Theories
While there has always been great
interest in the interpretation of human
dreams, it was not until the end of the
nineteenth century that Sigmund Freud
and Carl Jung put forth some of the
most widely-known modern theories of
dreaming. Freud's theory centered
around the notion of repressed longing
— the idea that dreaming allows us to
sort through unresolved, repressed
wishes. Freud's theory described
dreams as having both latent and
manifest content. Latent content
consists of deep unconscious wishes
or fantasies while manifest content is
superficial and meaningless. Manifest
content often masks or obscures latent
content.

Building Your Health

Good health is a prerequisite for happiness and fulfillment. So how does one pursue health? How does one build a healthy physique? And how does health set the stage for success?

Ten healthy habits:

1. Remove sugar from your diet. The down sides of sugar are numerous including:
   Feeds candida. We all have candida. Healthy bacteria feed the gut. problems occur when candida overwhelms the system. Excessive yeast in the system can cause mental illness. This has hit me on a personal level. I was psychotic when I was a teenager due to excessive sugar consumption.
   Sugar is DANGEROUS. It makes your blood acidic. A healthy body is seventy percent alkaline and roughly 30 percent acidic. Viruses cannot live in an alkaline environment. Alkaline foods are all vegetables. Acidic foods are all sugars, meats, poultry, and dairy. Sugar is the king of all acidic foods.
   Sugar promotes aging and wrinkling. Take sugar out of your diet if you want to remain free of wrinkles.
   Sugar can lead to osteoporosis. Take sugar out of your diet if you want to remain fracture free as you age.
   Sugar rots your teeth. Do you want to maintain strong bones? Take sugar out of your diet. Give yourself the gift of health.


2. Remove gluten from your diet. There are five primary reasons why gluten is dangerous. One: Celiac disease is on the rise and most people are undiagnosed. Two: Gluten sensitivity is common and can ave serious effects. Three: Gluten can cause brain disorders including depression, schizophrenia, and autism. Four: Gluten can be addictive and can lead to other addictions. Gluten can cause problems with the cerebellum, with speech, and with brain ataxia, resulting in mental decline.


3. Incorporate exercise into your daily routine. Some of the benefits of exercise include: weight control, reduction of heart disease and high blood pressure, elevated mood and energy levels, increased libido, and having fun


4. Take up the practice of tai chi. Benefits of tai chi include increased balance, strength, and aerobic capacity. relief from fibromyalgia, and stress reduction.


5. Do balance exercises daily. Balance can become an issue especially as we age. Doing a daily ten to fifteen minute balance routine can pay off in terms of reducing the chance of falling and fracturing a hip.


6. Do some aerobic exercises daily.


7. Make your diet mostly alkaline.


8. Maintain a cheerful attitude.


9. Be tested for allergies and remove all allergens from your home and from your diet.


10. Eliminate all dairy.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9503566

Your Ego Is Not Your Amigo: Your Friend

There's a true and a false ego. The false ego is who you "think" you are; the true is who you know you are. One is of the lower self; the other is of the higher Self. The true ego feels good when it thinks, says or does something good. The good feeling comes with humility and gratitude - which is acknowledgment that the good wasn't caused by him alone, but in conjunction with his inner or higher Self. He knows he didn't do it of his personality alone, and he's grateful for this knowledge and power.
The false ego on the other hand thinks that any good he does is from himself alone. He thinks that he is God; that the world revolves around him alone. He can't see anything else nor does he want to see anything else. Nothing is bigger or better than himself. It's all about him first, last and always.
This is his false coping mechanism, his false method of survival, his false security blanket, his false comfort zone. Such a person may have material success but will never be very healthy, happy, peaceful or free - because he's living in falsity not reality.
The false ego is very subtle, devious and powerful. Correcting it is the most difficult challenge we face in life because it does not want to die, does not want to commit suicide. It wants to continue the delusion that it is God, and will go to any length to maintain that delusion.
The only way you can annihilate or neutralize the false ego is through some form of what we call "meditation." Meditation in this context means a way to transcend thinking because thinking instead of knowing is from the insecure ego instead of the truth. To get to the truth we have to bypass the ego. Pure meditation is how you do it.
But here's the catch: If you meditate for the purpose of overcoming the ego you will fail because then your meditation is no longer pure. Purity means effortless or purposeless. If that's what your "non-intention" is then you'll overcome the false, personal ego because then the thinking, egotistical mind is not part of the equation. The thinking mind alone is what deludes and empowers the false ego in the first place. And you cannot solve a problem with the same mind that caused it.
While pure meditation does not have a purpose, it does have a result. The result is that the false ego is exposed as being delusional. And anything exposed can be dropped at will, while anything hidden is extremely difficult to overcome.
Pure meditation is simply the practice of keeping a little distance from all you see, hear, think, feel and do, all the time, to the best of your ability.

How To Find Out Your Passion

Oscar Wilde is known to have said: "Each man kills the things that he loves." And it is true. How many times have we killed our dreams and passions in life when we are faced with the mere possibility of actually getting what we want? We look at all the people around us who have failed to get what it is they want and we think to ourselves that we do not deserve to get what we want either. We completely forget the obstacles we overcame, all the suffering we endured and all the things we had to give up in order to get this far. We forget.
It is so easy to forget that which we were not passionate about the first time. If the passion was there from the very beginning then it should still be present at the very end. Paulo Coelho one of the best-selling and most influential authors in the world in his book the Alchemist, points out that we all have a personal calling; that God given chosen path that we ought to follow here on earth. But not many of us follow this path for we are not filled with enthusiasm yet in essence passion and enthusiasm go hand in hand; without which it is impossible to truly understand your life's purpose on earth.
A multi-talented friend of mine who seemed to excel at everything an anything once commented on his inability to truly discover what he was truly good at. In my opinion, practically everything he touched turned to gold, be it in at work, sports, school, the arts, and or, social relationships. I would never have believed him had he not mentioned it to me personally because he was one of the few people I had interacted with in my life who just seemed well put together. They say true happiness comes when you "do" what you're most passionate about. But what if you don't know what it is you're passionate about? And so the question arose: how does one go about finding their true passion?
The first step perhaps would be to get quiet. What this means is simple. Understand that passion first and foremost is more of an internal experience rather than an external event. Finding your passion means connecting your head with your heart. For many of us, this is a challenge. Our busy, chaotic lives disconnect us from our feelings. When you are still you are able then to become more sensitive to things in your environment that you have never noticed before; things that express your likes and dislikes. It could be you love buying and reading car magazines for example. This could be the beginning of a truly successful car remodeling business.
Conversations with friends about your gifts, strengths and weaknesses and asking yourself certain questions can also help you getting started. For instance, what would you do if money was not a concern in your life? What is the one thing do you dream about most? What did you love when you were a child? What are the five things that you're good at? Or what would you regret not having done if you had only one more week to live?
All things considered it's time to look for a mentor or coach; someone who is doing exactly what you think you want to do and is succeeding. Talking to them helps you to find out find out more about what is involved in your passion, it may further help you realize for sure, whether you're truly passionate about it or not.
Growing up it was instilled in many of us that what we wanted to do was unattainable. As the years wore on this was compounded by layers of guilt, prejudice and fear. Taking a risk was not an option, yet this is the only way to discover your true passion. Taking a risk means taking action. Putting what is in the mind and heart to practice and stepping out of your comfort zone. For some of us we discover our passions by mere accident. It just happens! Think about Steve Sanders the little boy wonder. His parents discovered their son's musical talent by accident when Steve was only five years old. Herbert Sanders, Steve's father, was learning to play a gospel song on the piano, and stopped playing abruptly in frustration. But Steve continued singing, and began his soloist career.

Harmon At Home: Important For The Family

Harmony at home is a crucial factor if the members of the family wish its development collectively and individually. If the purpose of the family unit is to reproduce, bring up, educate, share and care the off springs, nothing of these could be successful if it loses harmony within. If the home life is a troubled or confused one, in consequence the same would be reflected in the work he does. No self or family development is possible if there is discord and disharmony at home. Harmony between father and mother, parents and off springs and among siblings should prevail in abundance for the development of the family.
Misconception or misunderstanding, lack of communication, forgetting and negligence of individual responsibilities towards each other, selfishness, lack of patience and lack of love are some of the causes for the discord and disharmony at home. Everybody in the family should be aware of his or her duties and responsibilities towards the other. Even Little children should be assigned some of the suitable responsibilities of the family. Expenditures should be according to the revenue. What is expected from one should not be beyond his capacity. In male dominated societies, attempt to reverse the position from father to mother would result in discord and disharmony in the family.
When there is no harmony in the family, in spite of the development, one can see the deterioration in the every aspect of the family. Frequent quarreling between husband and wife, hindrance to children's education, scattered family situation, children becoming victims of the bad society, getting addicted to drugs and alcohol by father and male children of the family, prostitution are some of the bad consequences of the discord and disharmony of the family.
When husband respect the rights of wife and children of the family and when he understands and fulfills his responsibilities for them and when wife also does her part understanding and respecting rights of others in the family, happiness begins to prevail. Children will be happy and they will continue their education successfully and their future will be secured. When there is peace in the family, they have good chance of doing their businesses and their jobs well and thereby their revenues also will increase. When the harmony prevails in the family, the mental and physical health of the members of the family will become favorable. Therefore in conclusion, if a family wishes its development all the members should act in a way that preserve the harmony and peace of it.

Steps To Finding Out Your Values

Last time we talked about how knowing your values are essential to increasing your productivity.
This time, I'll show you how to use the 5 simple steps framework to figure out both your moving-towards values and your moving-away-from values. For simplicity, let's call them towards values and pain values respectively.
Firstly, let's work on your towards values.
Step 1: Identify Your Peak Moments
Before we choose our values, we need to know what's most important to us in life.
It may be hard to randomly come up with vague names like excitement, popularity, power, affection, fun, beauty etc.
So here's a list of questions that help you identify what you value most:

• When were the times when you were most happy? What were you doing? Who are you with?
• Do you remember the few rare moments when you are most alive? What was going on and why did you feel so empowered?
• When were the times when you felt most proud of yourself? What happened? Are there other people celebrating with you?
• When have you felt the most satisfied and internally fulfilled? What, why and how did that experience give you a sense of life meaning or purpose?
• What are the biggest decisions have you ever made? How did you make a decision about that?

Step 2: Identify All The Values You Feel Important To You
I recommend you googling "Values List" and you'll find hundreds of values names.
From there, select all the values that you feel that's important to you.
Step 3: Narrowing
You may have circled or highlighted or written down 50 values that seem important to you.
That's okay.
Now you need to narrow down the list to just 10-20 values. It helps if you combine values that are of very similar nature.
For example, if you value achievement, ambition, career promotion, you can name them "professional growth and success"
Once you have done it, you 'll need to again pick the top 5-10 values that you feel represent what's most important to your life right now.
Remember, values can change over time.
Don't worry about being correct or perfection. Just choose top 5-10 that is most suitable to your current life stage.
Step 4: Write Down What Each Value Means To You Specifically
There's no need to follow the general definitions. People often can't relate with a particular value because they don't think the word accurately describes how they really feel.
The word is only a guide to serve you. So go ahead give your values a particular meaning that's catered for yourself only.
For example, when I first did this exercise, I defined "healthy" as "having a strong, lean, fit body and have endless flow of energy to have peak performance" while "gratitude" as "to be calm, tranquil and thankful for whatever happens and understand that everything happens for a reason and it serves me".
Step 5: Rank Your Values
It's time to rank them in order of importance!
As it's difficult to decide which values come before others, you can use the Paired Comparison Method.
Let's say you have your top 7 values. You compare value 1 with values 2-7 respectively. And then repeat value 2 with values 3-7.
Decide how much more important the value you picked is compared to the value you didn't pick. Assign it a number from 0-5, where 0 means that they are both really important to you, and where 5 means that the value you picked is much more important to you than the value you didn't pick.
When you're finished, add up the score for each value. The higher the score the value gets, the more important it is.
When I first did it, I got these towards values: Healthy, Gratitude, Integrity Love, Passion, Resourcefulness, Sustainability, Open-mindedness, Impact.
Once you've found out your towards value, use the exact method to find out your pain values.
It's a long exercise to do, but it's very important to you if you are serious about aligning your life in a way that makes you most happy, productive, passionate, successful, and fulfilled.
So now go and start your assignment!

Recognising And Dealing With Stress In Children

As parents, you may have experienced some rough days wherein you just cannot understand your children's behavior. But for some, there are children who just drive you nuts every single day. They are referred to as a "stress child." Some would also call them a problem child.
Five-year-old Chuck is in constant motion. He cannot handle frustration - cannot wait his turn, cannot sit still or keep quiet. He does not listen, he has trouble concentrating, and he often loses interest in a game or task. Because of his distractibility, he usually is not doing what his parents want.
Chuck is hyperactive, but unfortunately, undiagnosed. His parents have come to view him as challenging them out to sheer devilment. With harsh punishments, they have made matters worse.
Chuck's problem is complicated by the fact he has become a "stress child" in his family. When Chuck's father has a bad day at work, stored stress is often channeled into anger toward Chuck, who is usually doing something wrong. His mother is much more likely to scream at Chuck or to punish him than other children. Chuck carries the implicit label of "bad" and is taunted or made the brunt of jokes by his brothers and sisters.
For different reasons, 14-year-old David is also a tress conductor in his family. David is caught between his warring mother and stepfather, whose volatile tensions become arguments over how to discipline their son. When he becomes angry at her, David's stepfather often vents that anger toward David. His mother supports the rift by complaining to her son about how her husband mistreats her.
In dozens of ways, children can inadvertently be singled out to bear the burdens of a family's stress. A child may become a conductor of stress because he constantly disappoints parents whose expectations are too high. Or because he possesses characteristics a parent does not like in him or herself. A child may also have other characteristics that set him apart and make him vulnerable to criticism or contempt, such as tendency to move at a slower or faster tempo than other family members.
If one of your children may be "collecting" stress, consider these strategies to tame him or her and strengthen his position in the family:
Warm up the relationship by sending clear messages that your child is loved. Sow that love by being attentive and listening carefully.
Refrain from criticizing one child in front of another. Institute a rule that kids are not to criticize each other. When Michael's mother asked him to take a bath, his older brother said, "Yeah, you smell." Mother asked, "What's the rule about being critical?"
Make a rule you will do the parenting. Michael's mother could have also said: "You're not the mother so you please stay out of this."
Agree with your spouse to have your arguments, disagreements or discussions about children in private.
Create positive relationship time to repair and maintain the bond between you and your child.
Make a habit of talking about what is going right instead of what is going wrong.
Let the little things go without comment and give your child plenty of room to make mistakes without incurring any penalties.
Soften your approach to your child. Keep your tones friendly and use plenty of humor. Depend on problem solving rather than punishment.
If your child still maintains the entrenched role of "stress conductor" after you have tried these strategies for several weeks, you may need to consult an expert to work on family issues or to determine whether physical causes, such as hyper-activity or learning disabilities, may be contributing to the problem.

Recognising What personality Is

The personality is an expression of ones' spirit and soul, showing in some as attractiveness and some others "a need to keep one's distance," and all other characteristics of general demeanor, as expressed in the person's behaviour, way of speaking or what in some people is known and accepted as the unexplainable mystique called charisma.
Needless to say, that the attractiveness of all such charisma must be dependent on a complementing, or exceptionally pleasing, inner personality - or the SELF! This in turn, is conditioned by its thoughts and intentions, which, understandably, must be clean, free of ill will or other questionable nature, conversant with what is ethical and beautiful and usually combined with a matching intelligence.
Nature herself creates such appearances of beauty in nearly all of her expressions. We are thus aware of the beauty of flowers, of the sunset, of tranquil scenery etc. With all of which are aware of the same emanations as the manifestations of our awareness of "personal charisma" or all other "pleasing personalities" with appeal and charm.
It is a natural expression when it is real (often with the absence of awareness of its possessor) and can never be copied or imitated, just like the difference of form and beauty in flowers for instance. Some people lack such "natural presence", quite often due to less desirable thinking habits, questionable intentions and all such "inner secrets" which do not qualify as "beautiful".
If we all heed our thoughts, guide our thinking patterns, exchange love and "good will" for feelings like envy, jealousy and hatred; add more positive and constructive rather than destructive intentions to the outward expressions of our minds, and add the awareness that thus we are beautiful! - will not emit its radiance to others enhance our very looks, our confidence, with our own charisma? And, who knows, -change our relations with others, life as a whole and maybe through the mark of such change make itself felt in the betterment of our relationships and "our inner and outer world"

Natural Cures For Boils

5 Natural Cures For Boils
Mother Nature has remedies for everything. Nature has all kinds of medicines for the most complex diseases like cancer to simple problems like boils. All we need to do is to find the natural cures for boils.
However, before we talk about this, let's talk about why boils occur. Boils are generally caused by a localized infection in hair follicles. The culprit is generally staphylococci bacteria. Furuncles or boils are not a serious problem; though they are indeed painful. When boils erupt in a cluster, then it's known as a carbuncle.
Once the infection occurs, then the pus starts collecting. In the process, the area becomes more painful and tender. With the passage of time, it forms a head with a yellow or white centre nodule. Eventually it bursts, drains and heals.
Natural cures for boils involve prevention as well. You need to maintain good hygiene, take care of problems like acne, diabetes, dermatitis and even problems which weaken the immune system. A strong immune system is more likely to resist this boil causing bacterium.
Here are some methods which are almost as effective as the conventional cures and have no side effects.
1. One of the well known techniques is fasting. Fasting helps in cleansing the toxins accumulated in the body.
2. You can apply colloidal silver which is a natural disinfectant and antibiotic with no side effects.
3. Garlic is one of the best known forms of treatment since it purifies your blood, boosts your immune system and is a natural antibiotic.
4. Fruits with abundant vitamin A also work well, since Vitamin A is a well known antioxidant.
5. Vitamin C containing fruits are known to control inflammation and even help in the stimulation of your immune system
These natural cures for boils work extremely well in conjunction with proper diet patterns. Avoid fast food and other grease filled eatables, exercise well and see your boils vanishing with thin air.

2 Reminders For Parents

1. Your children are responsible for their own Joy
The first reminder is this: each person on this planet is responsible for identifying, expressing and living out their own happiness. We recognise that that may be an obvious statement. But it is a very significant one to recognise, and to remember, in relation to playing the parent role. Of course the way that human living is designed makes it so that young human beings depend upon their parents for a long time, much longer than any other animal. That is not random. It is no coincidence that the species on this planet with the highest development of consciousness also spends the most time caring for and guiding their young. However, it is very significant not only to take care and guide your young, but also to convey to them powerfully, and clearly the truth that they and they alone are responsible for identifying and expressing and living out their joy.
What is happening a lot in the current parent-child dynamic within the culture that you know is that parents are taking their role too far, and children are growing up under the mistaken and damaging presumption that their parents are responsible for their happiness. It is a very debilitating and unfair teaching to convey, whether you are doing it consciously or not.
Now we recognise that especially with young children it is not as if you are sitting around the table and telling them your beliefs, it is not as if you have a list of your beliefs up on the wall. No, they are absorbing your beliefs by how you are, by what you embody, by the tiny little choices you make on a daily basis. You are not overtly telling your children what is so, but you are showing them anyway. So we raise with you a reminder that it is of great value: to show your children that they and they alone can own and make possible their joy. If you are giving them the opposite message, you are portraying an untruth that will trap them for much longer than is required, that will keep them resentful and unhappy for much more time than need be.
So in saying this to you, we are inviting you not only through your overt teaching, but through your day-to-day decisions, conversations, actions, to present to them consistently that they must own their joy. That is not the same as not taking care of them, it's not the same as not considering them as equals in your home, and it is not the same as being parented the way you were parented. But we are alerting you to this, because culturally this is happening a lot. You might think that this produces happy children, it does not. Entitlement - mistaken entitlement - and happiness are not bedfellows.
We raise this with you so you may stay alert to this. It is easy within a particular time and culture to slip into practises that the current generation considers good, evolved and sophisticated. And many of the new parenting practises are that, but it is vital that you convey to your children the truth that you have had to battle for, work hard for. If it's a truth to you, then it is your responsibility in the way you are with them to pass that along.
That is after all why the human species spends so much time with its young, in the interest of an evolved generation. Evolution can happen much more quickly in the human species, than in any other. It's possible, for example, within one generation to change a habit, a practise, or a belief, that has been steadfastly adhered to for a long, long time. That does not happen so quickly in other species. That's why you pour so much of your energy and time and other resources into your children, much more than any other species, and for the single reason that this should in theory support the optimum expansion of joyful living, high living, amongst human beings. And that is why we bring you these reminders.
2. The desires you have for your children are the desires you have for yourself
The second reminder that we are very grateful to bring forward to you today is similar, but we will present it in a different way. We wish to suggest to you that the desires you have for your children are always the same as the desires you have for yourself. So if you are wondering what kind of person you really wish to be, engaged in what kind of pursuits, living what kind of lifestyle, free from what sorts of constraints, and expressing yourself in which particular manner you need only look for what you desire for your children.
It is appropriate when children are young to arrange their lives around your desires for them. They have agreed to that as souls. Understand that from our perspective, which is a perspective where choice is a deeply sacred gift, it is very strange to ever cede your desires over to another. But because of the length and intensity of time that human children spend with their parents this agreement is happily made in the interests of the greatest evolution of the children, and of the whole.
Children have agreed, which is not the agreement in other species, but in yours, children have agreed to spend some time of their life arranged under the desires of their parents. But please recognise this as an anomaly in the bigger picture. Please recognise this as an exception. There's good reason for this exception, you have much to deliver of beauty to your children by raising them the way you want to. However, however, the time span where there is benefit in your desires running the show is short. It is appropriate, and it is valuable, and it is beautiful, but it is not ongoing.
And it is not true, simply not true, that you know and will always know and be able to know what is best for them. So many of you hold yourselves ransom to that misbelief. You are shackled under the burden of trying to know what is best for your children, and then what's more, the burden of trying to make them choose that. Unnecessary, unnecessary effort and anxiety.
While they are young, and what we mean by young really differs from child to child, because at different stages children begin to assert their own desire, it depends on a number of factors. But while they are young, while they allow it, while it works, it is appropriate for you as parents to choose for them. But this is an exception, a short exception to the general rule, which is that it is the responsibility of each person to run their own lives, including, including children.
So we invite you to recognise then, to make clear to yourselves, what desires you are consciously or subconsciously hold for your children. What do you want for them? Who do you want them to be, what do you wish that they choose? Make those desires apparent to yourselves, so that you are not their slave, but can instead be their master.
Then, secondly, you must acknowledge that you want that for yourself. Your children are the closest experience you have in the human world to an extension of yourself. It's a fascinating dynamic, and one that has tremendous opportunity for tremendous growth on both sides. So understand that your children, especially when they are young, are the closest thing you will experience to an extension of you. That means that you are likely - very likely - to project unto them your own un- or sub-conscious self, including what you fear and what you desire. That's not a problem or a mistake or a tragedy. To some degree you can't avoid doing that, and to some degree it's necessary - it's the way you fulfil your promise to your child, which is: 'I promise that I will choose things on your behalf, for you, for a while'. And there is no possible way you can do that other than through the filter of your own desires. So it's appropriate. However if, after a while, you confuse your desires with theirs, it makes this particular relationship deeply difficult.
So step one, become aware of what you desire for them, step two own that, and take steps towards giving it to yourself. In that way your children can be an enormous blessing to you, because they can alert you to what you may actually want for yourself, but are unwilling to acknowledge, or feel undeserving of, or think it's too late for, and so on. You also do them a tremendous service in return by owning that those are your desires for you. Because if you take steps to realising them, you are much less likely to capture your children in the net of your own desires for longer than it is beneficial for them to be there. That is step two.
Step three is to begin, slowly, slowly in an age-particular way, to articulate to your children what are your desires for them. There will be times in their lives when it is appropriate and beneficial that your desires rule the roost. However, if you are making it apparent that they are your desires, then it will be easier for them to own their own desires, to know that there is space for those, to begin to take responsibility for them, express them and live them, rather than live yours. You can easily do this simply by the way you voice what happens in your home. Of course there are times when then choice of the child can happily and beneficially top yours, in certain instances. But in other instances, especially around subtleties like what we believe, and how we live, what we do with our resources, take care not to portray these as necessarily being what they must choose, but instead to articulate that these are your desires. They are what is happening at this stage, but at another stage the child must own their own choices, and of course make their own happiness.
We raise these two reminders here with you, in great love. Not at all because you are getting it wrong, but because you are getting it right. So many human beings misunderstand this particular dynamic. You presume when - in this context or any other - when you receive some guidance, a new way, a slight correction, perhaps you presume that that necessarily indicates you've been doing it wrong. What it necessarily indicates is the potential in you for getting it right, the capacity is already there, the permission for beautiful parenting must exist in you prior to us bringing this teaching. So please do not receive it as correction, receive it as acknowledgement, and further support of your clear permission to parent beautifully and wisely.

Natural Remedy For Constipation

Constipation occurs when the droppings are mobilized very slowly through the large intestine, which results in hard and infrequent bowel evacuations. Most of the most people suffer from constipation at one time or another. Normally, a change in lifestyle and eating habits helps alleviate symptoms and it's one of the simplest forms of a natural remedy for constipation.
In most cases, the source of constipation comes from the lack of consuming fluids and fiber. The fiber is found in plant foods such as whole grains, fruits and vegetables. Soluble fiber in water acquires a smooth texture and helps to soften the stool. Indissoluble fiber passes through the large intestine virtually unchanged, adding volume to the stool and stimulates intestinal contractions. When looking for natural remedies for constipation you must also factor in your nutrition. Are you eating the right types of fibers and fluids. Other factors that cause constipation are lack of exercise, elderly muscular disorder, structural anomalies, intestinal diseases and neurogenic disorder inadequate diet, especially an excessive consumption of junk food. Constipation can be a side effect of Iron Supplements and medications including painkillers and antidepressants. It is very common during pregnancy.
All Natural Remedies for Constipation
All Bran and Plums
- 2 spoons of all bran cereal
- 2 plums no seeds
- 8oz water
8oz water add 2 spoons of all bran cereal and 2 plums to 8oz of water and let it sit overnight. In the morning blend everything and drink before having breakfast.
Flax-seed and Pineapple
- 2 spoons of flax-seed
- ¼ of pineapple
- 8oz water
Add two spoons of flax-seed oil to 8oz of water and let it sit overnight. In the morning add pineapple and blend. Drink before having breakfast.
Oat Meal Celery and Grapefruit
- 2 spoons of oat meal
- 2 pieces of celery
- ¼ grape fruit
- 8oz water
Add two spoons of oat meal to 8oz of water and let it sit overnight. In the morning add celery and grapefruit and blend. Drink before breakfast.
Other Recommendations that Help Support Natural Remedies for Constipation

• Drink more water. This is important when adding more fiber to your diet. Drink at least eight glasses of water 8 ounces each, with or without thirst.


• Eat plenty of foods rich in pectin, such as apples, carrots, beets, bananas, cabbage, citrus fruits, dried peas and ork. Pectin can also be found as supplement.


• Make a low-fat diet. Do not eat fried foods.


• Avoid foods that stimulate the secretion of the mucous membranes, such as dairy products, fats and highly seasoned foods.


• Do not consume highly lactose product, soft drinks, meat, white flour, highly processed foods, salt, coffee, alcohol and sugar. These foods are very hard to digest and contain little to no fiber.


• Exercise, physical activity accelerates the mobilization of feces through the intestine. Walking for twenty minutes is usually sufficient to relieve constipation besides regular exercise is important to prevent this disorder in the first place.


• Go to the bathroom at the same time every day, even if you don't have a bowel movement urgency, relax. Stress compresses the muscles and can cause constipation. Many people relax by reading. Never suppress the urge to defecate.

spoiled Honey: Not An Area Of Concern

Many people worry about foods spoiling; spoiled honey however is not one of those foods you have to worry about. That is when dealing with raw, natural honey of course. Raw honey hasn't been treated or heated in any way, so naturally occurring enzymes and beneficial components are intact. The fermentation of honey helps increase these properties. How does fermented honey come to its most natural and beneficial state? These are a few basics behind fermentation of this natural, healthy product.
Conditions for fermented honey -
In order for honey to ferment a moisture content level of at least 19% has to be attained. Due to the fact that most honey doesn't contain this high a moisture level content, it will require the addition of water or some kind of moisture, in order for the fermentation process to occur.
Mead -
This is the most simple and most highly chosen method of fermenting honey. It is the most simple form, basically the combination of raw honey and water. You can make it dry or sweet, depending on the amount of honey which is used in the process. Dry would typically take 9 to 12 pounds, while sweet requires anywhere from 16 to 22 pounds of raw honey, depending on the volume being made of this form of fermented honey.
Lactic acid -
Another fermentation method is to ferment the honey into a lactic acid beverage, which contains bacteria. This process can take on many forms; the most natural of course would be to use the honey as the sweetener in this process of creating a wine or other beverage being fermented using honey in it.
Storage of honey -
Back to the idea of spoiled honey, again, the naturally high level of enzymes and anti-bacterial components in honey, make it a food which is shelf stable for several years on end. In fact, proper storage, in temperature controlled rooms, with properly sealed, tight lid jars in place, will allow you to store honey for dozens of years. This will not only allow the honey to breath naturally, it will also help in preventing possible crystallization when dealing with honey products which are higher in sugar content.
How do you know if it is bad? -
The color, viscosity, liquid texture, sweetness, and odor are a few indicators. Although honey won't go bad in a few months or even years (regardless of how it is stored), proper storage can help maintain and increase stable life. Some things to consider for storing include:
- Choose porous, clear, glass jars for storage.
- Consider room temperature, controlled areas.
- Choose conditions which will help prevent crystallizing in the jar.
Honey is one of the many foods which isn't going to spoil, go bad, or cause you to become ill, even if the color is a bit off, or the texture is not as runny as it typically is with newer jars. But, noting these factors will help extend shelf life, allow you to use honey as a natural sweetener in fermenting, and allow for extended lifespan of the natural, healthy, sweetener.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9493325

Good Health

Human beings are part of nature. All beings are governed by the Laws of Nature. When we abide by the Laws of Nature there would be peace and harmony. When we go against it, then, there would be chaos and disaster.
The deforestation and the emission of gases from industrialization have resulted in the green house effect on our Mother Earth.
Health is the most precious thing in life. without it, even with all the wealth in the world, one can never really enjoy life.
Research made by scientists shows that human beings could live to about 120 years. However today the average life span of mankind is only 60 to 70 years. This means that man only live half of the actual life span. More tragically, many people spent their last phase of this shortened life span in and out of hospital or bed-ridden because of illness.
Let's look at the ills of modern living that contribute to the cause:
1]Water pollution - Effluence containing lead, mercury and other heavy metals discharged by chemical plants, weed killers, pesticides and fertilizers used onto the ground are polluting the ground water which we drink.
2]Air pollution - Emission from factories, automobiles, ashes and smog from open burning and forest fires, radioactive dusts and molecules from nuclear tests are relentlessly released into the air, which we breathe.
3]Pollution at homes and offices - Paints used in home and office furnishings, detergents and chemicals used are contaminating our homes and offices.
4]Toxins in food - Various colorings, preservatives, growth hormones, antibiotics and insecticides are found in meat, seafood, fruits and vegetables we consume everyday.
5]Drug induced diseases - The many drugs that are consumed everyday and the chemicals contained are found to have caused new diseases.
6]Bad habits and life styles - Excessive eating, alcohol, smoking and late nights have become part and parcel of modern living.
7]Stress - Family commitments, hectic social and business engagements, and complex interpersonal relationships are some of the contributing factors of stress.
These factors are taking a heavy toll on human health. Under existing living conditions, it has been estimated that an average adult would take in 3 to 5 kilograms of toxins and harmful substances coming from eating, breathing and through the skin in a year. This is the root for the alarming increase in the various types of disease and cancer today.
Since the appearance of mankind on earth, they had been collecting and eating plants for food. They discovered that some plants could alleviate ailments or cause it to disappear. Thus, the knowledge on the curative aspects of plants could be traced back to the existence of mankind.
China, especially, has a long history with vast and rich experience in the use of herbs for health care and treatment of illnesses. One of the earliest books and records on medicinal herbal plants was written more than 2,000 years ago in China. Traditionally Chinese medicine dates back to more than 5,000 years and the efficacy has been proven with time. The uniqueness of traditional Chinese medicine is in its formulation. When herbs are combined and balanced, the effect becomes synergistic. The wholesome goodness of Mother Nature should not be overlooked. The effect may be slow but it would not give rise to bad side effects.
For Good Health:
1]Drink a glass of fresh lemonade daily.
2]Mix together a little portion of fresh celery, carrot, wild bittergourd (without its seeds), Japanese cucumber, guava (with its seeds) or apple, potatoes and lemon's juice and its skin; blend with water and drink it daily.
3] Excercise regularly.
This will give you good health.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/73150

Benefits Of Eating Rice

Fashion week is a week-long event that is held to commemorate the fashion industry and the cogs that keep the wheel moving. Fashion designers, brands and houses display the latest and best of their collection via runway shows. Buyers and the media are prominently present during this activity and this helps the designers to showcase and sell their work. Fashion week is an important event in the lives of the fashionable since it is here which determines the trends that are in Vogue and those which are passé. The most popular and well-known fashion weeks are held in the four major fashion capitals in the world namely New York, London, Milan and Paris.
Fashion has stormed the globe in a big way and some other countries which also host other important fashion weeks in the world are; Madrid, Australia, Rome, Dubai, Hong Kong, Buenos Aires, Singapore, Toronto, Jakarta, India, Berlin, Barcelona, Seoul, Tokyo, Sao Paulo, Los Angeles and Dallas.
Fashion week is a seven day long entertainment cum business event where people from all walks of life fraternize with those from the fashion industry. This event is bi-annual in nature and is held in the major fashion capitals in the world like London, New York, Paris and Milan. Fashion weeks are held several months prior to commencement of the fashion season so that it allows the buyers and press a better chance to preview the trends and designs for that season. January to April hosts fashion shows to showcase the autumn and winter collections. On the other hand, September to November showcases the spring and summer collections. This gives ample time to the buyers, retailers and purchasers to assimilate and include the fashion designers into their stores.
Latest innovation, flamboyant designs and striking new trends are showcased during these fashion weeks and all the latest collections are compiled into a special report and covered in all the leading fashion magazines in the world as well as the websites which cater exclusively to fashion. The first ever fashion week was held in 1943 with the purpose to distract attention in World War II from French fashion when workers from the fashion industry were unable to travel to Paris. It was believed that designers in America relied on the French for their inspiration and design. A fashion publicist by the name of Eleanor Lambert had organized an event called Press Week to showcase the works of American fashion designers. Magazines such as Vogue began to feature more American designers in their features and stories.
In the year 1903 a New York based shop held the country's first ever fashion show to lure middle-call socio economic groups into the store. Close on their heels, in 1910 major department stores were holding private fashion shows of their own. Along with promoting fashion these shows had elements of entertainment and were very theatrical in nature. It was theme based and accompanied with a narrative commentary. Fashion weeks helped in integrating all aspects of the fashion industry and bringing it under one roof.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/7327240

Health and Wellness

Most people forget that good health is the greatest asset they can have in life.
They work hard all their lives without taking proper care of themselves
for many years until one day they break down.
Don't wait until you've a nervous break down, to face the reality.
You should balance your activities with the proper amount of rest.
Some of the leading experts in the field of aging now believe that regular exercise along with the proper amount of rest may actually add years to the life span.
Results from a number of tests indicate that speed and muscular strength of many of the elderly can be extended.
Leading authorities agree that this new data is going to shatter many of the myths about aging and physical performance.
The conclusion now is that the performance and ability of the elderly has long been underestimated, diet, proper sleep and exercise along with rest and relaxation are all important factors in preserving our bodies.
Laughter is one of the best things for your mental and physical state.
People are naturally attracted to someone who has a good sense of humor.
You can develop a good outlook and a good sense of humor by associating with and surrounding yourself with pleasant happy people.
Recognize that stress is a killer. A life filled with stress can really wreak havoc on your body causing a number of illnesses such as hear attacks, strokes, asthma, gastric problems, menstrual disorders, ulcerative colitis, angina, irritable colon, increased blood pressure, ulcers, headaches, etc.
There are different types of stress such as mental, emotional and physical.
Emotional stress seems to take the greatest toll on everyone.
All stress is not bad; in fact, life would not be very interesting if it were not met with challenges.
However, too much stress, too often with no effective and appropriate outlet, does not allow the body and soul to recuperate.
You might review a typical week to see if you can identify things that might be making you anxious or causing you stress.
Once identified, stressors can be attacked and eliminated.
Are you a worrier? Chronic worriers don't have more serious problems than others - they just think they do.
Many worriers try to cope by trying not to think about their problems, but this just makes things worse.
Doctors say that chronic worriers feel less anxious if they actually spend a half-hour a day thinking specifically about their problems.
Get plenty of exercise. People who are physically fit look good and feel good.
A good exercise regimen will lengthen your life. Improve your appearance, build self confidence and help delay the aging process.
Remember that you need to do something physical every day.
If you don't use your joints, quite simply they'll tighten up with age to create the stooped, bent and worn out appearance we so often associate with old age.
Studies have shown that people with arthritis experience less pain if they continue to keep their joints flexible.
As one gets older, the bones tend to get brittle which is why it is common for senior citizens to break bones and especially their hips when they fall.
Eating right, getting proper sleep and learning to relax are all very valuable in maintaining a healthy body and mind.
And keep in mind that eating healthy foods and avoiding those high in fats, sodium and cholesterol will help to decrease your risk of heart disease, high blood pressure and associated problems.
May these good health news and insights help you to live a longer, healthy and happy life.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/19151

Foods for Healthy Teeth

What we eat has a lot to do with the kind of teeth we possess. We know there are food items we should not eat as they cause great harms to the dental hygiene. Similarly, we know there are foods we should eat on a regular basis to boost the health of the teeth and bones alike. Therefore, it becomes important to know all food items that we should eat so that the teeth can remain as healthy as we wish them to be. Not eating healthy foods means compromising with the health and hygiene of the teeth, which no one should ever do.
Here are some healthy foods you should eat on a regular basis to keep the teeth healthy -
Apples
Apples are indeed sweet in nature but they are not harmful since they are rich in fibre and water. They help produce saliva in the mouth which takes away food particles and harmful bacteria. More so, the fibre help stimulate the gums and keep the dental health intact.
Carrots
Carrots are a rich source of fibre. Besides, they are crunchy too. They help produce saliva in the mouth in the same manner as apples do. Eating carrots on a regular basis minimizes the risk of cavities. What's more, carrots have vitamin A in abundance to strengthen the teeth and bone.
Leafy Greens
Eating foods rich in vitamins and minerals is great for your dental health. And that's where leafy greens do the trick. Above all, they are low in calories as well. Together with promoting oral health, they boost the enamel of the teeth due to the presence of calcium. They are considered helpful in keeping gum diseases at bay.
Yogurt
Dairy products in general, and cheese in particular are considered great for dental health. They are rich in calcium and protein - two of the most important elements for strong and healthy teeth. More so, yogurt contains helpful bacteria that are considered good for rooting out gum diseases completely.
Almonds
Any food item that is low in sugar yet high in calcium and protein can be extremely helpful for dental health. This is where almonds help a lot and gives one a healthy teeth. So, with regular consumption of almonds, you can get health teeth for sure.
Cheese
Cheese minimizes the risk of tooth decay. It increases the level of pH in the mouth and also helps produce saliva. Being rich in calcium and protein, it helps boost the tooth enamel and leave one with healthy teeth.
Celery
Dentists recommend celery as it brushes away food particles and bacteria from the teeth. More so, it's a rich source of vitamins A and C to keep you away from gum diseases. So, including celery in your diet on a regular basis is a great way to improve your dental health.
Overall, you should be careful with the food items you eat as not all of them are meant to support your dental health. So, eat only healthy foods and get healthy teeth.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9501883